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He was a shy kid, too introverted to feel fully comfortable in the real world, and he logged on to the early internet’s bare-bones web forums for a sense of connection.
There he found friends: other people who were awkward in real life, particularly when it came to sex and dating.
The subreddits, he tells me, showed him “how manipulative some women can be when seeking validation” — that they are, in his words, “emotional tampons.” Abe still wishes he had a girlfriend.
He writes about wanting simple things, like baking at home with a partner or holding hands while watching a movie.
Yet incels are not merely an isolated subculture, disconnected from the outside world.
They are a dark reflection of a set of social values about women that is common, if not dominant, in broader Western society.
He found incel communities on Reddit, ones that helped reaffirm his belief that his looks were responsible for his terrible dating experience.
It was, he told me, “kind of an SJW [social justice warrior] community.” In April 2018, about 20 years after the early incel community coalesced, a college student in Toronto named Sohe Chung decided to walk to the library.
It wasn’t a short walk — the subway would have been faster — but Chung and her roommate, So Ra, wanted to enjoy the sunshine. On the way there, a van hopped the curb onto the sidewalk and slammed into pedestrians.
Over the past two decades, the incel community, which numbers somewhere in the tens of thousands, has fallen under the sway of a profoundly sexist ideology that they call “the blackpill.” It amounts to a fundamental rejection of women’s sexual emancipation, labeling women shallow, cruel creatures who will choose only the most attractive men if given the choice.
Taken to its logical extreme, the blackpill can lead to violence.
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